When we think through evangelism, I think that it is helpful if we remember that there are differences in approaches that is determined by relationships, or lack there of. I see two distinct classifications to place each in; relational evangelism and cold evangelism (see post series here).
We all have a sphere of influence in other people’s lives. We spend time with family, friends, neighbors, co-workers, and those in our communities. And each relationship will carry a varying amount of trust gained and knowledge learned about each person. This becomes very important for us when we are sharing the Gospel.
This means that not only our words matter, but also our deeds, choices, and integrity. When considering how one strives to protect their reputation for the sake of the Gospel, the words of the Apostle Paul comes to mind:
I run in such a way, as not without aim; I box in such a way, as not beating the air; but I discipline my body and make it my slave, so that, after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified.
1 Corinthians 9:26-27
The Apostle serves as a great example of one who had the desire to build relationships for the singular purpose of preaching Christ.
For though I am free from all men, I have made myself a slave to all, so that I may win more. To the Jews I became as a Jew, so that I might win Jews; to those who are under the Law, as under the Law though not being myself under the Law, so that I might win those who are under the Law; to those who are without law, as without law, though not being without the law of God but under the law of Christ, so that I might win those who are without law. To the weak I became weak, that I might win the weak; I have become all things to all men, so that I may by all means save some. I do all things for the sake of the gospel, so that I may become a fellow partaker of it.
1 Corinthians 9:19-23
This is how we have to look at our relationships for the sake of preaching Christ. The first priority is to preach Christ and since it is the priority, we have to live in such a way that gives us the opportunities to do so.
Pay close attention to yourself and to your teaching; persevere in these things, for as you do this you will ensure salvation both for yourself and for those who hear you.
1 Timothy 4:16
The imperative is to pay attention to your life and to your doctrine, since both matter.
So here are a few key components to building the relationships for the purpose of preaching Christ.
Gospel Priority
When you view your relationships, you will inherently view them through a certain lens and that lens will govern your relationship with the people in your life. But learning to view all relationship through the lens of the Gospel takes cognate effort.
Why would you honor your father and mother? Because it puts on display your submission to Christ in response to His love towards you. If you were to disrespect them, then what you would be doing would be dishonoring to the King and putting a wall between you and them. So you honor them in order to honor Christ, and gain a voice in their life.
So goes with every relationship. As the Apostle Paul put it:
Therefore from now on we recognize no one according to the flesh; even though we have known Christ according to the flesh, yet now we know Him in this way no longer.
2 Corinthians 5:16
Time
Every relationship takes time, and most of your relationships you will have an opportunity to build them. For instance, my family and I have moved into the neighborhood that we live in a year ago. In this neighborhood there aren’t too many rentals, so everyone is locked into a mortgage of sorts and we are going to be seeing them over the long haul.
We knew that we had to be strategic in how we handled the relationships. We did not come out of the gate with the Gospel on first meeting our neighbors but have built up to it. We have been intentional to get to know our neighbors, serve their needs, and have them in our homes. And they have watched our lives, with our kids, and have witnessed us praising God through prayer and song.
But along the way we were feeling them out, learning their beliefs and convictions, and have been able to share Christ explicitly over time. Now there is not one neighbor that we have had in our home that has not heard the Gospel, and keep hearing the Gospel as God gives opportunity. They know what we believe, and we know what they believe.
We have their trust and they know that we care and aren’t just forcing Jesus on them.
Questions
A wise man seeks to understand and the best way to learn, especially about people, is to ask questions. Questions are the starting point to being able to reach people. It shows that you are actually interested in them as a person, not just a project.
Being an expert at asking questions will gain you much ground in having future opportunities to preach Christ. You will learn of problems and pains that rest in their heart. You will learn of regrets and failures or success and accomplishments. You will learn if they are sensitive or hardened.
All of these equip you in how you will eventually bring Christ into the scenario. So become an expert at asking questions.
Compassion
Life is hard and eventually everyone will go through the deep difficulties of living in a fallen sin cursed world. This is why we need to be compassionate people seeking to understand why someone is the way they are, not just assuming. Not everyone is closed off and arrogant because that’s how they want to be, but many are that way because of the pains of life.
God can reach the most hard hearted person and He uses those who are willing to love beyond their comforts. While others are running from those who are difficult, pray that God would give you a heart to run to those individuals.
Our greatest example of compassion is Jesus.
Seeing the people, He felt compassion for them, because they were distressed and dispirited like sheep without a shepherd.
Matthew 9:36
When He approached Jerusalem, He saw the city and wept over it, saying, “If you had known in this day, even you, the things which make for peace! But now they have been hidden from your eyes. For the days will come upon you when your enemies will throw up a barricade against you, and surround you and hem you in on every side, and they will level you to the ground and your children within you, and they will not leave in you one stone upon another, because you did not recognize the time of your visitation.
Luke 19:41-44
Even when He had to cast judgment on Jerusalem, He did so with a broken heart. He wept over those who had rejected Him. If the King of the universe can weep over those who reviled Him, and rejected Him, how much should we be willing to show compassion, for we too are the recipients of great compassion from our Lord.
Conclusion
Making the Gospel the priority in our relationships with people will take time, questions, and compassion. This requires intentionality and work on our own souls as we bare them before the Lord but the outcome will bear much fruit, if only in our intimacy with Christ. May you persevere.
What other considerations would you add to the above?